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Just cried my eyes out because I THOUGHT about eating one chip. And I hate myself. I do nothing all day besides school.. I'm really a waste of space.. I would NEVER have pictured my life like this 5 years ago. I can't stand my mother.. I'm a bitch to her. I feel bad when I'm around my dad because I hate hurting myself and hurting him by hurting myself. And my sister... what a great fucking example I'm setting for her. She brought home McDonalds today with my mom and said to me, "I didn't call and ask if you wanted anything because you always say no." I'm a horrible person.  I want to get out of this body, I wish I had a family that liked me. Who I could talk to. Who could take care of me. I don't want to be me anymore. I want to talk to my friend who knows about my ed, but I chicken out every time. I want to tell her that my world is spinning and how I hate myself and, I don't even know. I feel like crying every moment of the day. This life sucks. I wish I could go back.