This week has been awful. I found out the person I trust and love the most isn't who I thought he was. I can't even look at him. I hate being home.. and I hate being anywhere else, really. It's not fair that I know this.. and he doesn't know that I know.. nobody knows that I know.. and I just feel horrible. I've been hibernating in my room mostly or on the treadmill in my basement. I hate waking up and having to lie again.. act normal. Thank God for work, getting me out of the house. I feel so sick over what I found out, I ate way less than normal this week.. not doing good, atm. Just want to stay in bed forever. So exhausted, but I won't sleep.