brb, lol.

taking a break from everything.. it's all getting to hard.

5 things you can't live without.

Someone made a post on PT asking what 5 things we couldn't live without.

my number 5 was my dad and my sister.
Not my mother.


I've thought about, many times, what I would do if ever my dad was to die. And each time, I can't picture living without him.. how I'd manage to go on... I don't think I'd be able to... (and I don't want to find out).. The same thing with my sister, except I'd imagine I'd do horrible things to the person (if she died because of a person) who did it to her. I'd be lost without her.

And then I think of what I would do if my mother died. I'd be really sad, even though we don't get alone, we don't relate to one another, we are polar opposites. But I don't see myself shutting down. I see myself feeling bad that we never had the mother/daughter-relationship that I always envy in movies, or in my friends families.



I don't know why I felt like writing about that.

wee

Ate 540 calories yesterday.

More than I've eaten collectively in months.

I think I'm proud of myself.





I reply to blogs tonight!

small steps

So, by no means am I trying to recover yet, and I know I'm not one of those people who could do it by myself, I'd just like to try and get myself a little healthier.
Today was day one I suppose.

I had 2 slices of watermelon for breakfast.. let's say 100 calories to be safe.. although I think it's more like 45..
Then I took a vitamin and felt sick because it has fish in it and I'm allergic. So I've felt like crap all day. 10 calories for that.

For lunch I had a small salad with some grilled chicken.. that's nothing new, as that's all I normally eat everyday.. (plus half of a yogurt but I didn't have one today).. There are 105 calories in my salad.

Then for dinner I went out to eat. This is where I am proud of myself. I ate half a sandwich MADE BY SOMEONE ELSE. I only ate half of it, picked off half of the turkey so I had 1/2 a slice of it, and I kept on the lettuce. AND I ate a pickle. I think that's like, 170 calories.

I guess it's not a lot. But it's more than I've eaten in a long time. 385 today. Good, no? :)

PLUS I didn't work out today because I felt too sick from the vitamins, so I'm feeling very anxious about that. But... Idk.

MILK

I've been craving milk.
I'm going to a concert this Friday, Dave Matthews.. my topic got negative 1 views on PT, lmao.. Dave fail.
I've been working like a madwoman, doing school work, spending time with my family actually.

4th of July is my favorite holiday. We always have a party, it was actually really fun. I laughed a lot more than I usually do.. idk.

I have nothing really to say anymore. Kinda drained.. can't say why. I think I'm just tired tonight.

Hope everyone is well. Sorry for the pointless post, lol.


Like seriously, I'm hardcore craving some milk.