Felt like fainting today, but i didn't.
Didn't have to eat today, so I didn't.. oh I had oatmeal.
LIES LIES LIES.
I'm so stupid. My boss saw me today at work today and gave me a hug.
Idk why, well I guess I do know why, but it was random.. but it felt nice for someone to care.
I wanted another hug. No one ever hugs me. Idky. Maybe I'm unhugable? lol is that a word?


I went to my friends house after work with another friend. We watched 16 and Pregnant.. when it came on, it was the girl with anorexia. My friend was like "Yay an anorexic!" I was like "...*silence*...."
Lol but Nanny always makes me feel better so I texted her and we joked about it. "God anorectics are so annoying." lmao DAMNIT ABBY! Bahaha. okay okay inside joke.
Apparently my friends and I are baking tomorrow. I actually like baking, I guess.
I think we are making banana bread and snickerdoodles? No fucking clue when snickerdoodles are.. but I'll find out.. lol

Anyways, I got a migraine at her house and wanted to just die.. If anyone gets them you know what I mean.. basically all through 16 and Pregnant my head wanted to explode and my friends ate popcorn.

I guess nothing happened today. I was home alone all day. The usual.



Here's to the girls on their boards with bruises and scars.
Here's to anyone who never quit when things got hard.

green leaves.

really don't have anything to say.. I just wanted to thank you, lillyzara, for you comment on my autism post. that gives me a lot to think about and you were extremely helpful. thank you so much.

i do some of the things you described, but not all of them. for one, I am horrible at math lol.
but again, thank you.

tired.

exhausted.
all the time.
i never want to do anything, go anywhere, see anyone.
but i do.
my whole body hurts today.
and pt was exhausting today.
so much drama, it's getting annoying.

also, turns out i'm not going to florida with my friends.
i'm elated.

and i thought I was gonna get a D on my report card in astronomy, because i never go to class.
i got a B.
I got 3 B's and an A.
not great for me, usually I get mostly A's.
but idgaf. i'm happy for that B.





i'm nothing special.

autism.

So I don't have it, I'm positive, like, I think I would have been diagnosed by now, if I had.
I was visiting my friend this weekend, in Indiana, and I'll admit, I'm a pretty fucking random person.
I hate awkward silence, or any silence, and so I just ramble and talk.
Well I said something like, "Wow, all birds seem to only fly in only pairs here." And my friend was like, "lol okay.."
And then I said something stupid about talking dogs and if they would tackle me or kiss me if they escaped their fence.
And she says, "The things you say- it's like you have autism."

I was like hm... I laughed, because she meant it as a joke.. not that autism is funny... but whatever.
But it got me thinking.. that I think differently than other people.. I keep thinking how I think differently.
Maybe I see things differently, the world? Idk.. but she put that stupid idea in my head.
That I am different.And it makes me upset.
And it's all I can think about.
I don't want to be different.

I fucking think weird.


-Birds in Indiana fly in pairs.
-The round-about sign looks like a sun.
-What are dogs thinking?
-Can you feel clouds if you get high enough?

bye bye, PT.

I won't be able to get on PT until probably Wednesday.
I'm going to visit one of my friends from IU.

dramatic.

Those posts about "what did you eat today" made me feel bad today.
Idk why. I usually don't give a shit.
It was like, 'what did you have for breafkast?" and I was thinking, well, nothing.
I'm just in a touchy mood. Annoyed at the world, lol.
Don't know why this made me upset. But now I just want to lay in bed forever.

ew.

Also, my dog peed in the house today.
I normally wouldn't mention that, lol, but I stepped in it.
Fml. Now my foot smells like pee.
And I have to write a 1 page paper.
Not complaining about the paper, just about my smelly, pee-foot.

Must go wash it now.